On social media and etc, I now have a lil reputation. If you say something racially insensitive, sexist, homophobic, or just stupidly apathetic to social issues, I will … comment. I have no problem pointing out the necessary nuances of said comment to the attention of that person; be it my friends, church members, co-workers, family members, high school class mates (especially) or even random strangers on the city bus, I will call you out. I’m just educating, mane!
I say all that to say that I’m starting a new series:
It will be the unfiltered, unadulterated, unapologetic, insensitive upheaval of all my opinions about those comments or conversations. It’s either this or I’ll keep “aheem”-ing on your post!
Every Saturday. Starting…. NOW
Reality TV Show Women
Women like Cardi B., K. Michelle, Skyy, and Keyshia Ka’oir have let us see all the nitty-gritty of their lives while being bold and unapologetic. They are raw and outrageous on reality TV; showing the world everything from sexual exploits to tragic indiscretions. Sure, it can be painful to watch these women do some stupid and embarrassing things, but they also keep it 100 in the freshest way.
Remember when Cardi B. went to etiquette class and tried to speak without her dialect but then she also showed us the pain of being mistreated and played by men who promise to protect us. Or how Skyy enhanced her body and discussed her insecurities frankly but also shared the heartache of get rejected by the children she gave up for adoption. And for that, I ain’t mad at these women who are willing to expose the humanity and hilarious-ness of simply existing as a black woman.
I, for one, am tired of being judged solely on my man-get-ability or how dignified I am. I want to wear what I want, say what I want, do what I want, and be what I want. Don’t get me wrong, I answer to God but ultimately everyone has the individual choice as to who/what governs their actions. Unless she is hurting me or herself, it ain’t my business.
But what about being a role-model? Oh please! Between Modanna and Patti *Voulez-vous coucher avec moi*… the older generation ain’t have the best role models either. But being a role model isn’t about being a certain type of woman, it’s about being fully a woman and fully yourself. Nobody learns from someone putting on heirs. We wanna see people keep it 100!
From Cardi, I’m learning that people will like you or not no matter what you fix or do. You can’t please them. So please yourself.
From K. Michelle, I learned that it’s okay to try. Life is too short to stay in a lane. The whole highway is yours for the driving.
From Skyy I learned that you shouldn’t be ashamed of where you came from and where you’re going. The past deserves to be respected and honored but don’t shame yourself into living a lesser life.
From Keyshia Ka’oir, I’ve realized that you are your own biggest fan. Don’t wait for anyone to do for you what you can do for yourself.
There’s something to be admired about a woman who stands confidently in her own beauty, intelligence, quirks, and truth. Even if it isn’t your cup of tea, I can respect any woman who discovered her own flavor.
Honestly, put me on a reality tv show. I think the world could learn something from a chick who can’t afford to enhance her butt or shrink her belly, can’t keep a man, and must film after 5pm because she got a full-time job. And you’d see all my uncomfortable and awkward moments. Ugly cries and stupid silliness. But you’d also see me triumph and traverse and hopefully teach someone a trick or two about being the greatest version of them. Not a role model per say, but just someone keeping it all the way 100.