I Don’t Drive Anymore

My psychiatrist asked me why I don’t go out as much as I used to
I told her I don’t have a car.
She said “There are so many ways to get from point A to point B, lack of transportation shouldn’t hold you back.”

I told her “I didn’t say there was a lack of transport…

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I once had a spaceship doctor, and I used to use it to fly all around the planet. From that distance I could see the forest and the animals and all things good in the world. Then I looked again and I saw global warming and the ice caps melting and the forest on fire. That depressed. So I pushed the red button, the one that’s marked “do not push” and I let all the universe enter into my space ship. So now I don’t travel by spaceship anymore.

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Doctor, I once had a boat. Not as big as the ark or as small as a toy but something comfortable and cute. I sailed. I sailed everywhere from the Nile to the James but once I came upon the Atlantic, I could feel the tormenting of my ancestors – some who and jumped and other who were thrown- and that depressed me. So I lowered the mass… from the top of the boat all the way through the boat floor and let the ocean’s water swim in. So now I don’t travel by boat anymore.

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I once had a plane. A personal private jet doctor and I loved it. Named it Destiny. I flew all over the United States and saw the mountains and the deserts. But when I looked behind me. I realized I was creating chem trails and contributing to the pollution of our planet. And that depressed me . So I turned off the engine, and my plane begin to spiral down to the Earth where I would meet the very people I has poisoned. So I don’t travel by plane anymore.

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Doctor, I once had a car but there were too many animals trying to use the road too. So I swerved and went over a cliff. I rode the bus but the front was reserved for people with handicaps and the back felt disrespectful. So I pulled the red latch, feel from the rear end into traffic. I called an Uber. Paid doing a surge and even planned to tip but the driver wouldn’t stop talking about their life and all the sad things I couldn’t fix. So I told her they were all my fault and let her take her anger out on me. So I don’t drive, bus or travel by Uber anymore.

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So, I decided to just walk. Put on brand new tennis shoes and walk. But then I got to a bridge and I thought about all the people who had jumped. I wanted to jump doctor, I wanted to jump so bad. And how cliche to jump from a bridge that I know tomorrow someone else will be jumping from too. And that depressed me. So I don’t walk anymore. I stay in this house and I stay alive and isn’t that what I’ve been paying you to help me do.

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